How could I? How can I still....

Dear Lord,
This is wai san here...hmm.. i m reflecting on wat wei mei tell me yest.. he is seeing someone..at first, i m thinking - impossible, i alwayz saw him around/ at home (online)..

then i start to think.. lately he drives out for lunch - possible meeting someone out frm here.. someone he is after now? possible
then.. weekends - lately he not online - yea, mayb on date with someonethen...
fb - someone asked him if he is watching movies with chicks again...? he say wish to... u c someonee mentioned "... again?"
hmmm..doesnt it a double hint, he is seeing someone now?

how could i not thought of all this thgs ler, lord?
how can i still so stupid?
how can i still not putting it down?
how can i still so naive?

furthermore, he brought along a fren/ coll the other day when accompanying me to collect back my stuffs... u c he brought along a coll i noe... so, it mean nothg again..

triple hints.. he is not into me..

Dear Lord.. why why why?
are these the hints/ signs?i m getting it.. but why it seems i hear some other thgs frm my heart? is it just a fake voice/ fake feelings?

Dear Lord, pls help me...pls...
really.. i thk i m dying.. really.. dying of bleeding love..

Lord, is all my fault.. is just my fault.. what to do to stop the feeling?
do i really need to leave the job? after i feeling the management change.. seeing myself of nowhere here, is it to leave, Lord?

is my feeling true? or just some unknown voices from nowhere.. illusion..
Lord, pls show me some real signs? I am very de confuse.. and I really dont know how.. and wat to do...
pretending cool is all i can now........

Lord, really please help me..